September 30, 2015

Fizzes and Tickles

"What'll you have?"

"Beer's good."

The fizz tickled.

An hours-old "It's definitely you, not me" declaration and a final exit's relief echoes in my head.

A job is life's filler. Not the other way 'round.

Fizzes, tickles...taste like freedom.


September 2, 2015

The Time I Copied Kim Kardashian and Wrote A Letter to Myself

It isn’t too often I take a page from Kim Kardashian (like never), but doggone it, she had a good idea: writing to her future self.


Thanks for the find, VProud!

So, with that in mind, I penned a letter to my ten years from now future self.



Dear Rochelle,

Geez, you’re so much smarter than the 46 year old me. Remember waiting for Divine Retribution or karma or whatever to take hold and intervene on people ten years ago?

You peacefully released the cartoon anvil drop fantasy on folks who were all kinds of wrong. You realized it rains on the just and unjust; and your perceived slights are now mere shadows, if you can remember them at all.

You allow a breathing room for your daughter and you to err and to be human. You abandoned the periodic, unsaid mental freakouts over the unexpected, unplanned, unarranged and imperfect.

You live an honest and authentic life. Your daughter sees what you’ve been driving toward, and I’ve got a feeling she’ll follow, even if she strays from it for a little while.

You haven’t wasted the last nine years burning a hole in the carpet pacing back and forth about a visit from Cousin Cancer and his dad Uncle Grim Reaper.

Instead, you enjoy the air you breathe and are present in this leg of the life journey you and your husband are taking. Keep doing that. Seriously.

But you’re still fighting the mirror. The only thing I can tell you about that is this: the smiley gap that seems to widen a little with each passing year? Can't you see the toothy-spaced grin that mom, Grandma Mary Jane and Aunt Josephine passed down to you through the generations in it?

And now you’re looking at your jowls. Stop it and go get a picture of dad. See? That’s Percy's face right there in those chubby cheeks.

The years will go on -- on paper and on your face. But you must remember, your aging face reflects the people you miss along with their legacy.

Now you’re thinking about your daughter. I am too, so I’ll pat you on the back and give thanks to God for gifting that kid with a soft heart, hard head and sharp discernment.

She’s chasing her dreams and flying from the nest you and your husband made for her. It’s a weird mix of hurt, longing and pride I know, but trust me -- she’s on her way into a new life -- and so are you and your husband.

You’re 56 and he’s 61. Maybe you’re both working, maybe not. His hair has long decided it wasn’t worth the fight to even show up and there isn’t enough contouring base to chisel your jowls into sharp definition. And it’s all okay. Really.


You two are happy, in good health and rediscovering each other and what it means to be ten years older. Together.

It’s all good, Ten Years Older Rochelle.

Now that you've finished reading this, send a thank you to Kim Kardashian. This letter was her idea in the first place.

Sincerely,

46 year-old Rochelle